Chapter Text
Mare intra me est.
The sea is within me
Hermione Granger
Unknown Cabin,
Unknown Location
Ginny lounges on a chair slowly picking at a vine of grapes while she talks to Ron and Dante. Ron stands with his back to the fire and holds a beer as he laughs at Dante and Ginny. She lazily throws her head back, mouth open and eyes glinting with a hint of intoxication. Ginny’s cheeks are red from the heat of the fire, she leans forward slapping Dante on the thigh. Hermione watches Ron smile in a carefree way, moving to the music and listening to his sister. Ginny's long hair falls down over her shoulders, she is beautiful beneath the starry sky and happy.
Harry stands behind Ginny’s chair, leans over and squeezes her shoulders. He kisses her on the top of the head and nods towards Hermione who is drinking quietly by the fire, further away from the group. Ginny follows his gesture and smiles brightly at Hermione, a little wave with the grapes in the palm of her hand.
Hermione wishes she could bottle this moment and keep it for herself, stay within the confines of the meadow and among all the laughter that rolls through the night air. Harry strolls over, butting out his cigarette into the bonfire and grinning at Hermione.
“It’s nice to see you smiling,” Hermione muses with a glass of wine.
“It’s nice to see you alive,” Harry quips.
She nods, “I know. It’s just so unreal we’re all together, openly and can have a moment to breathe.”
Harry shakes his head, “Gods! Don’t jinx us.”
She rolls her eyes, “Don’t be silly.”
“You know how superstitious I get,” Harry sighs and nudges his shoulder against hers.
She rolls her eyes again, “I know how ridiculous you are around Quidditch Matches.”
“Well,” He lets out a longing sigh as he watches Ginny. Her beautiful red hair is bright against the flickering flames and her smile is so big it’s contagious. “I don’t want to risk it, not when it comes to you all.”
“Even Malfoy?” Hermione jokes.
He scoffs, “You’re drunk if you think I care about that twat.”
She stares at Draco, talking to Theo with his shoulders relaxed and his eyes looking up at the blanket of stars. “I wish you could see, he isn’t that bad.”
“I care about you, therefore I’ll reluctantly respect your choices. He hasn’t won me over… yet, not even with his grief performance earlier in the Infirmary.” Harry forces a smile, raising his beer bottle to Malfoy. Through gritted teeth, “Though it was nice to see him cry over someone other than himself for a change.”
Hermione smacks him on the arm, “Don’t be so cruel.”
“I’d never want to be on the end of that experience, I can’t imagine how he felt.” His drink lingers inches from his lips and he looks over to Ginny, “Thinking you were dead. Must have been f*cking awful.” He shudders, blinks and then focuses on Hermione. “For now I can see he cares about you, so I’ll tolerate him.” He drinks slowly from his beer and smacks his lips together, “For now.”
“Thank you,” Hermione sighs, “He’s made a lot of mistakes, I am well aware of his misgivings.”
Harry’s lips press into a thin line, “More mistakes than I’m willing to swallow, but he’d give his life for you and that has to count for something.”
Hermione pulls Harry into a hug, and feels his tight back muscles relax as he falls into her. “Thank you, that’s all I can ask.”
“Doesn’t mean I have to like it,” Harry whispers.
Hermione laughs, “I’m being careful.”
Harry pulls away and smirks, a big grin taking over his face. “Didn’t look like it from where I stood in the cabin doorway.”
Hermione’s cheeks redden, “He gave me a small towel. Blame him.”
“That’s all he gave you, I hope?”
Her face is now crimson, “Harry!”
Draco glances up at the sound of her voice, one eyebrow raised in question. Hermione resumes her focus on Harry and feels her face burn with embarrassment. “Just stop it,” She hisses and lets her hair fall over her face, trying to hide from Draco.
“You're like my baby sister, I’ll break his fingers if I find out he took your virginity hours after you almost died.” Harry huffs, and blows a strand of hair from his eyes. “I’d even tell Ron, just to let him have it.”
“Ron is unstable,” Hermione growls.
“Right, he is,” Harry replies. “After Lavender, he’s protective of you and Ginny, it’s all he holds onto. I don’t think he’d survive if something happened to either of you.”
“Nothing will,” Hermione lies. “And if it did, I know you’d take care of him.”
Harry raises an eyebrow, “Going somewhere?”
“Yes,” Hermione hisses. “Away from you if you keep talking about my virginity.”
Harry laughs, it is a loud and contagious sound that causes a smile to appear on her face. “You are such a prude you don’t even want to admit you’ve never been––“
“Harry!” Hermione groans. “Don’t you dare finish that sentence?”
“Well,” Harry chortles. “You are a virgin, you deserve to be respected. I won’t allow you to be a quick f*ck for any Slytherin, no matter how much he claims to love you.” Harry smirks, enjoying the horror in Hermione’s eyes and slowly drinks from his beer. “Love and lust are very closely related.”
“Oh,” Hermione whirls to face him. “You never told me you had a Doctorate in romance and relationships. Are you a qualified Sexologist as well?”
Harry looks over at Ginny and bites his bottom lip. “I may as well be, that girl drives me wild.”
“Why is it that you can be like a horny teenager but I have to remain celibate?”
Harry shrugs, “You're the girl who used to cry over smudged ink on her parchment. Would flinch at the mention of romance and who has turned down almost every eligible male in Hogwarts.”
“Have not," Hermione turns up her nose.
Harry scoffs, “Name one single person you’ve snogged besides Ron, me or Malfoy?”
Hermione purses her lips, “Diggory.”
“Bloody liar!” Harry laughs. “You wouldn’t have the nerve.”
“Cedric!” Hermione calls.
“Really?” Harry chortles. “You’re going to keep the lie going?”
“Cedric come here,” Hermione calls.
Pansy is straddling him, she looks over her shoulder with a murderous expression. “What do you want?”
Hermione blanches, the look on Pansy’s face causes her to regret her choice of opening her mouth. “Never mind.”
Pansy sees Hermione’s discomfort, “No. Tell us?”
Harry, drunk and a little high calls over the music before Hermione can slap a hand over his mouth. “Granger reckons she made out with your boyfriend. I think she’s a dirty liar because she’s only ever been with me, Ron and Blondie over there.”
“Potter?” Draco growls.
“Harry!” Hermione hisses. “Shut up. Just shut up now!”
Pansy turns to look at Cedric and tuts, she presses a manicured finger to his lips. “Naughty Cedric was mad at me, I suppose I can understand why he stooped so low.” She looks back at Hermione and shakes her head, “You were on the eve of dying so, I’ll forgive your lapse in judgement.”
“So it’s true?” Harry’s mouth drops open.
"Granger is a naughty girl,” Pansy tuts. “I bet if we hadn’t showed up she’d be in the bath right now with her legs spread and her back pressed against the hot stones. Isn’t that right ‘Mione?” She teases.
Hermione closes her eyes, heat rising to her cheeks.
“That’s enough,” Draco snaps.
“Oh relax,” Pansy chuckles. “We all know you’ve got a little Virgin Mary, I just didn’t realise you had such a kink for inexperience and––“
Draco pulls out his wand and sends a flurry of small firecrackers at Pansy, “Parkinson. Shut up.”
Pansy throws back her head, laughing. “You know I like pain play, the fire doesn’t scare me.”
“Cedric,” Draco growls and storms over. “Shut her up or I will.”
“You’ve had quite enough,” Cedric tuts. He glances over to Hermione apologetically, “Leave her alone.”
“I like teasing her, it really pisses off Draco.” Pansy kisses Cedric playfully, “She got herself tangled with him, it’s my job to keep her prepared for the inevitable sh*tstorm that will rain down on them both when their relationship is exposed.”
“I hope you don’t plan on being the one to expose them,” Ron growls.
Pansy rolls her eyes, “Hermione is a little princess and I want to remind her she’s no better than the rest of us.”
“You can talk,” Ron scoffs. “You act like you wouldn’t piss on us if we were on fire.”
Pansy blows Ron a kiss, Cedric stands up with her still in his lap and she wraps her legs around his waist. “I don’t act like that Weasel, it’s the truth.”
“Cheers to you too,” Ron shakes his head. “Why in Merlin’s name are we engaging with them again?”
Harry calls from his position with Hermione, “Because Granger here is fraternising with the enemy.”
Ron, Ginny and Dante burst out laughing. The tension disappears and Draco returns to his position against a table covered in food. He lights a cigarette, glances over at Hermione and when she nods at him he resumes his conversation with Theo.
Cedric walks towards the Cabin with Pansy in his arms, her giggles disappear into the night sky and Harry returns his attention to Hermione.
“So, guess you weren’t lying…” He offers his beer bottle to her, she clinks her glass against it. “Sorry if I embarrassed you.”
“You’ve been embarrassing me since First Year, I’m used to it.” She laughs, feeling the wine settle beneath her skin.
“So you're still being careful with Malfoy?” He spits the name. “Don’t let him take advantage of you.”
“You’re torturing me,” Hermione hisses. “Why are you making me feel so dirty?”
Harry pats her on the shoulder, “I just want you to do what’s right.” He glances over at Malfoy who is indecisive about walking over as he watches Hermione’s horrified expression. “In your own time, not anyone else’s.”
“Thank you, Father Potter,” Hermione says and each word drips with sarcasm.
“You were just as annoying to Ron and me, always making us take precautions and stocking us up with condoms. Which by the way, Muggles are barbaric.” Harry shudders at the memory, “They’re awful contraptions.”
Hermione bursts out laughing and the tension is gone. “I even got you colourful ones.”
“Yes,” Harry rolls his eyes. “Imagine my surprise when Ginny announced my co*ck was glowing in the dark.”
Hermione laughs so loudly she almost collapses to the ground, Harry grins at her and laughs too. She looks over at Malfoy who has a smile on his face as he listens to the sound of her laughter, she loves the way he lets her be when she is with Harry and Ron. She appreciates the way he trusts her so implicitly, glancing back at the Cabin she takes a mental note to give him the same trust when he is with Theo and Pansy. Even if every fibre in her body feels jealous, threatened and self-conscious around Pansy Parkinson. No matter how hard she tries, Pansy’s history with Draco both personally and sexually causes her insides to twist with unease and jealousy. How could she ever compete with her?
“What?” Harry finishes his beer and puts the bottle on the nearest table. “What’s on your mind?”
Hermione shakes her head, “How can I ever compare to Pansy?”
Harry smiles, “You’re just as beautiful and after I watched you in the Trial, hate to say, you’re just as deadly as her.”
Hermione looks over at Draco and sips slowly on her wine. “She and Draco have been together for years.”
“And a lot of things about them, Granger,” Harry rifles in his pocket looking down at his hand as he talks, “Are lies.”
Hermione huffs, “I suppose you're right.”
“They’ve been with each other for survival, he’s with you because he’s in love with you,” Harry says as he pulls out a small container. “That’s obvious.”
“Is it?” Hermione wrinkles her nose and swallows the last of her wine. “She makes me feel inferior.”
“He makes everyone feel that way, I think it’s just in their DNA.” Harry opens a small silver compact mirror. Ginny’s initials are engraved on the top in cursive. “Try not to compare, you’ll get caught up in your own head.”
“Is that what happened with you and Dean,” Hermione folds her arms and nods towards Ginny. “I mean, he dated Ginny for a while.”
Harry smiles, fumbling to open the mirror. “I suppose, but I come from living in a cupboard I always think I won’t measure up next to others.”
Hermione shakes her head, “You’re the chosen one.”
Harry rolls his eyes, “f*ck off.”
“You are,” Hermione laughs.
“And you went into the veil, seems you have some prophecies of your own to deal with.” Harry flicks the mirror and it opens, an array of brightly coloured flowers lay on the glass. The flowers are dried but have a strong scent of Mushrooms.
She wrinkles her nose at the smell and what Harry said, glancing at Draco she meets his eyes and forces a smile. “If I tell you the truth you have to help me.”
Harry shakes his head, “No. I don’t actually.”
She steps closer, “You saw what will happen if I fail.”
He stiffens, “Yes.”
Draco is watching them, his hands gripping the table beneath him tightly as he pretends to listen to Theo. His eyes never leave Hermione’s face, she covers her mouth as she whispers to Harry in fear he can read her lips.
“I will protect you all, no matter the cost.”
Harry pauses, his dark brown eyes searching her face. “Hermione?”
“No matter the cost,” She repeats through gritted teeth.
Harry’s eyes flick to Draco watching them intently, his smile fades as he returns his gaze to Hermione with understanding written on his expression. “There’s no other way?”
“It’s me or him," She whispers.
“None of us will ever recover,” Harry swallows the lump in his throat. “I don’t know if I can support you, let you go.”
Hermione puts her hand on Harry’s throat, he is immediately thrust into a memory of Ron being hog-tied on a table and Ginny dead on the floor at his feet. He lets out a whimper and she drops her hand, “Me or everyone.”
“No,” Harry shakes his head. “There has to be another way.”
Hermione closes her eyes, summons another bottle of wine and holds it up. “There is, we forget tonight and deal with it tomorrow.”
Harry’s eyes well with tears, he swipes at them and turns his back to Draco. Harry is well aware Draco is the only one at the Bonfire even remotely interested in what they are talking about. “I don’t know if I can,” Harry whispers. “He’ll kill me if he ever finds out.”
Hermione holds out her hand, palm inches from his throat but Harry gasps and steps back almost tripping over his own feet.
“No,” Harry shakes his head. “I don’t need to see, not again.”
Hermione closes her fist, she looks back at Draco still watching them and there is a glimmer of pain in his eyes. Pain because she is letting Harry in and keeping Draco out, it’s for your own good.
“Please, can we deal with this tomorrow?” Hermione begs.
Harry pulls her into a hug and tightly squeezes her. “How?”
“I have to go into the veil,” She whispers. “I have to take someone's place.”
“Who?” Harry replies and tries to pull away.
She keeps him tightly in her arms, inhaling the woody scent of his cologne and the bonfire. “It’s not my secret to tell,” She whispers.
“I am so sick of hearing that,” Harry replies.
“Harry,” Hermione feels tears stinging her eyes. She buries her face in the crook of his neck, “I will do everything I can to come back. I will fight for all of you as long as you promise me…” She pauses and whimpers. His arms tightly hold her upright, hand rubbing her back in an attempt to comfort her. “Don’t stop fighting for me, help me come back to him?”
Harry pulls back, his eyes filled with tears. He forces a smile, looking over her shoulder to Draco who she knows is watching them. “I’ll look after him if you promise to come back to us.”
“Until my last breath,” She shudders.
Harry puts a hand to her face, his thumb brushes the tears from her cheek and she rests into his palm. “I’ll be here, waiting for you.”
“Protect him, even when he shuts everyone out? Even when he tries to break everything in his path?” Hermione puts her hand on Harry’s, resting on her cheek. “Don’t tell him the truth until it is all done. Then show him this memory, make sure he knows how much I love him and that I want to live… I want to come back and make a life with him.”
“You will,” Harry whispers.
“You’ll tell him?” Hermione’s voice trembles.
“I’ll try,” Harry drops his hand and swipes at his eyes.
“You good?” Ron calls.
Hermione purses her lips then hisses, “Tell him nothing until after it’s done!”
Harry nods, “Drunk and emotional. You know me, I’m a tosser when I’m drunk.”
“Pothead can’t handle his pot?” Theo laughs. “Wanker.”
“Thanks, dickhe*d” Harry teases and forces a smile. “You good Malfoy?”
Draco’s grinding his teeth, Hermione can see from her position across the Bonfire that his jaw is tense and the muscles in his face are contracting. “Fine. You upsetting her?”
“No,” Hermione plasters on a smile. “Just reminiscing. I’m an emotional mess when I’ve had too much wine.”
Draco lights a cigarette, “So why are you showing him visions?”
Hermione pauses. “Just a memory of when we met.”
“That all?” Draco narrows his eyes.
Hermione can see by the look on his face he is well aware she’s lying through her teeth, so through a smile, she continues to lie. “Yes, that’s all.”
Draco resumes his conversation with Theo, the sting of lying to him sits heavy on her chest. Harry pulls out the compact once again and holds it out. “To forget?”
Hermione wrinkles her nose, “I don’t trust you and Ron. You’re always trying to get me high.”
“The higher you fly,” Harry teases. “The easier it is to forget the pain.”
Hermione huffs, he’s right. She needs to let loose and forget before she drinks too much wine and tells Draco everything. She can never tell him the truth, he will fight to keep her alive and the future will kill them all.
